What do we know about babies? We know that when they are born, they come into this world helpless, fearful, hungry and completely selfish!
There isn’t a baby anywhere that didn’t demand all his / her needs be met…. NOW! One of the most troubling lessons a new mother has to learn is “How long do I let my baby cry?” Never? You are raising a Tyrant! Until I can’t take it anymore? You are raising a manipulator!
Babies must cry! In moderation, crying is good for them. Too much and they get sick and tend to regurgitate or gag. Rule of Thumb is 28 minutes. Long enough so they get the picture, short enough so they don’t hurt themselves or develop unnecessary anxieties.
We’re told a baby needs to learn they can’t have everything they want, when they want it, and letting them cry facilitates this. Bedtime is critical. Let them cry! Babies who are not permitted to cry themselves to sleep, generally take longer to learn about bedtimes and do not get good rest for several years.
Why don’t animals have these problems? Because animals operate according to instinct. Human beings operate according to Will and Training. Their Will is not only strong, it is absolutely Corrupt! When the Training is insufficient to compensate for this reality, you have a 3 year old Tyrant who will grow up to be worse!
Everyone used to know this about children.
Today, most people reading these words are already outraged!!
So, why did a 4 year old fall into a wild Gorilla Pen? The 15 foot drop didn’t seem to deter him. The railings that formed a visual cue that people should not get any closer, wasn’t an issue. His mother yelling at him to stay with her and not wander off, was not sufficient. All that mattered was he WANTED to get in there! And he did.
Bad Parenting? Perhaps. But, let’s not put too much blame on Mom. There were plenty of other people around who could have / should have physically interfered… but didn’t!
Why? Because, as a society, we have quite literally “thrown the baby out with the bathwater!” We live in a society that rejects the idea that babies are Stubborn, Rebellious, Headstrong, Willful and Destructive! We refuse to accept the Basic Principles of Human Life: that we are born with a ‘heart’ [not the pump — but the core orientation] that is ‘deceitful, above all things, and desperately wicked beyond anything anyone can imagine.’ [Jer 17:9]
That “foolishness is bound in the heart of a child and only the ‘rod of correction’ is sufficient to drive it out of him!” Prov 22:15
That the human heart can be hardened against Reason, Decency and All Things Good and Godly Ex 14:5
And we have been conditioned to “Mind Our Own Business!” “Not Get Involved!” “Not Interfere!”
When we look around at the evil in this world, we want to blame all sorts of things: poverty, mistreatment, chemical imbalances, ignorance, stress, lack of education, persecution, etc. However, there are notable life-stories of people who have overcome ALL these and accomplished great things!
The Bible places the blame squarely on the heart! Jesus said, “out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, lies, blasphemies.” Mt. 15:19 AND…if these things are not driven out of a child, by means of reproof, that child will grow up to shame and embarrass his/her mother.
Why Mom? Because Mothers are the ones who bond with children and have the greatest influence. Mothers are the natural ‘nurturers’ and ‘supporters.’ A child spends more time with Mom than with any other member of the family…. until recently. Today, it’s likely to be Granma….Who is, herself, a Mother!
Our Culture a) Rejected godly counsel and instruction to form an alternative form of “family.” Then b) Split that family up with No-Fault Divorce, Working Moms, Single Moms and all sorts of alternative forms of ‘family.’ Concluding by c) waging war against unborn children who had the audacity to show up at the most inconvenient of times!
Now? Apparently it’s “every man (child) for himself!” We refuse to spend the time and effort to raise up a child in the nurture of God, assume he / she is an adult at age 13, then defend our selfishness by pointing to all the (legitimate) limitations in our life, as though they simply appeared out of thin air, when we weren’t looking.
There was a time when a man wouldn’t marry until he was convinced he could take care of a family.
There was a time when a woman would accept responsibility for her actions and raise that child.
There was a time when children accepted responsibility for their actions / attitudes toward others.
There was a time when a Family pulled together, no matter what!
Today? If I’m uncomfortable, unsatisfied, unfulfilled, I have a Right to break all my vows, promises and commitments because “I owe it to myself!”
Today? If I’ve made a serious mistake, in marrying the wrong person, I have the Right to fix that!
Today? If I can’t make enough money to pay the bills, it’s the government’s responsibility! It’s not my fault for being foolish or short-sighted or selfish!
Today? If I’m with my friends and having a good time, it’s someone else’s job to watch the baby!
My wife and I were chided for NOT asking Grandparents to watch our children. We were in our early twenties and simply thought those children were our responsibility: if we couldn’t take them with us, we didn’t go! And Guess What? Nobody Died!
Children in America are suffering and dying because Adults are redefining the words and rules to create a more comfortable society…. for them! It’s not One Mother’s Fault! It’s ALL Mothers’ Fault! ALL Fathers’ Fault! ALL Leaders’ Fault!
Children are a precious heritage…. We need to raise them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord! And we need to do it TOGETHER!
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